Update with me

Hello, its been awhile since i updated my Blog.

Today, I'm not gonna share any tips on how or what,

Today, i'm just gonna share about my personal life,

what have been on my mind, what have been bothering me for the past few days.

It's hard for me to say what's on my mind because no one's there to listen to me,

I cried but no one sees my tears,

I plead, but no one understands.. I know, its worthless if i wrote all this on my Blog but hey,

I feel a little burden had been lift from my shoulder.

So, the past few days, i dreamt about my ex,

I thought i've moved on but i guess i was wrong all the time,

I'm still hoping that some fine day he will find me,

dreaming about him, about how he used to love me

kills me deep inside.

Yesterday, by coincidence, i accidently walk pass him.

I didn't realize at first but my sister told me,

i got shivers all over me and cold sweats running down my forehead..

my hands shaking, but my sister told me to calm the fuck down so i did..

i pretending not seeing him, i laugh at my sisters, faking a smiles so he thought i was happy.

Seriously, i feel like a part of me was die at that time, 

I admit it, I miss you so bad.

I have to act like i'm cool and put my egos up high so that you realize what you've lost.

I lose my mood after you walk.

Suddenly, an unexpectedly text that i've been waiting for my whole life.

YES!!! a text from you, my dear.

I guess me and my sister's plans finally worked.

I act ego, like always

and i can feel that you still care and love me.

That last texts, you said Bye to me and ask me to always take care.

I hope that was not our last Goodbye..

until this very moment, i hope you will call me or at least text me

because i believe, we met for a reason.

a reason that either me or you know what it is..

If you came back to me, then it is meant to be.

I'm still waiting for you, there's still a BIG space for you in my hearts.

I do believe in second chances and i think everyone deserves one..

But if you didn't find me after this, i already knew the answers.